Grief Waves · Online, in English

It's not your mother who's hurting you today. It's the wave.

Grief doesn't move in a straight line. Months or years after you thought you'd made your peace with it, it can hit again — set off by a song, a smell, a date on the calendar. That's not a setback. It's a wave, and most of the time it isn't really about the person you lost.

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Systemic approach

If you're in the early weeks right after a loss, my page on grief may be where you want to start. This page is for something different: when grief you thought you'd already worked through comes back anyway, months or years later.

When grief comes back uninvited

Grief coming back later doesn't mean you didn't heal. It means a wave arrived.

Maybe it's a bolero that comes on while you're at your desk, surrounded by English-speaking coworkers who have no idea why you suddenly went quiet. Maybe it's a date that means nothing on the calendar you live by now, while your family back home is holding a misa you're not at. Maybe it's just a smell in someone else's kitchen. The wave doesn't check what language you're thinking in, or what country you're standing in, before it hits.

In therapy, we work with a distinction that matters more than it seems: the person who died, and the symbol that now represents them. Most of the time, when the pain returns like this, it isn't really speaking about the person — it's pointing at a need of yours, today, that the symbol just happened to touch.

Ricardo De Castro King — Clinical psychologist

Who's with you

I'm Ricardo, and I know grief doesn't finish on schedule

I'm a clinical psychologist with more than 15 years accompanying people through loss, trained in systemic family therapy. I live and practice from Barranquilla, Colombia, and I see clients online, in English. Many of the people I work with think in Spanish first — a song, a phrase, a smell can carry a whole memory that no one in their English-speaking day understands. You don't have to explain that part of it to me first.

A wave is easier to ride with someone beside you. If this feels like the moment, let's take the first step together — at your pace.

Master's in Systemic Family Therapy

Universidad Simón Bolívar

Clinical psychologist

15+ years of clinical experience

University professor

16 years of university teaching in psychology

Systemic-relational approach

Family & relational focus

Licensed Psychologist · Professional License 106127 (COLPSIC, Colombia)

Ricardo is licensed as a psychologist in Colombia (Professional License 106127) and works with international clients in private practice. He does not prescribe medication. Rules on cross-border online therapy vary by country and by state, so it's worth checking what applies where you live — and this never replaces local emergency care.

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Sound familiar?

3 signs this is what's happening to you

None of these mean the grief work you already did failed. They mean a wave found its way in.

💧

You cry without knowing why

The grief hits months or even years later, with no clear event that set it off — and it catches you off guard, sometimes in the middle of an ordinary English-speaking Tuesday.

🎵

A symbol sets it off

A song, a smell, a date, an object — something small brings back the full weight of the loss, even when nothing around you has changed.

🌍

Grief reaches you from far away

You live abroad, you didn't have the funeral nearby, and the guilt of not having been there mixes with the pain itself.

How we begin

A clear first step, no pressure

1

You schedule your assessment session

Message me on WhatsApp or leave your details in the form. We'll set up a first 60-minute video session, at a reduced rate (50% off).

2

We talk through what the wave brings up

In that first session, I listen to your story — what set the wave off, and what it's been like to carry it. No rushed diagnoses, no jargon: just understanding, together, what you need.

3

We decide the process together

You decide with real information, not blindly. If it feels right, we build a process suited to you. If not, I'll still point you toward what you need.

“

Most of the time it hurts, it isn't really about your mother — it's about you. Let's learn to call this what it is: the wave.

— Ricardo De Castro King · Psychologist

A simple exercise for the next wave: instead of only crying it out, ask the bridge question — what do I need right now that this wave is showing me? Honoring the love is valid. Attending to the need is necessary. Both can hold at once.

Your first step

Start with an assessment session

A first session to meet each other and shape your process. Reduced rate, so you decide with real information, not out of obligation.

US$25US$49.9950%

60 minutes · Video call · 100% confidential

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Want to explore first?

Want to understand your grief better?

If you want to keep learning while you decide, you can start here. There are free grief resources, in English, waiting for you.

Free grief resources

This will take you to MomentoVital, my open resource hub.

Also in therapy

Other processes I can walk with you through

Grief Loneliness Fear of Abandonment Latino Therapist in the USA

Prefer to talk first?

Write to me, and I'll answer personally

If you're not ready to schedule yet and would rather tell me a bit first, message me on WhatsApp or leave your details below. I answer personally, usually within 24 hours, no obligation.

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📍 Online · Barranquilla, Colombia

🕑 Mon–Fri 8am–7pm · Sat 9am–1pm (Colombia time)

I answer within 24 hours · Your information is 100% confidential.

If you're in emotional crisis or having thoughts of harming yourself, please seek help right away: in Colombia, call Line 106, or in the US call or text 988 (Suicide & Crisis Lifeline), or reach your local mental health line. You are not alone, and help is available right now.

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